Anxiety is more than just feeling stressed before a big meeting. For many people, it’s a constant, humming background noise that makes simple, everyday life feel difficult. You might find yourself cancelling plans, avoiding new situations, or struggling to fall asleep because your mind will not switch off. You know you want to feel better, but you do not know how to stop the worry from taking over. Anxiety counselling can focus in on your fears and help you manage your reactions better.
The loop that keeps you trapped
Anxiety loves a good loop. You have a thought, such as “What if I fail the presentation?” This thought instantly triggers a physical reaction such as a tight chest, a racing heart, or a knot in your stomach. You then notice the physical feeling and interpret it as a sign of danger: “My heart is pounding, so something must be wrong.” This, in turn, amplifies the original thought, making you feel more anxious.
You react to this fear by avoiding the presentation, the party or the phone call that caused it. The avoidance works immediately, giving you a rush of relief. But here is the problem. Every time you avoid something, you teach your brain that the fear was real and that avoidance is the only fix. This shrinks your world, and the loop tightens. You do not get to prove the initial anxious thought wrong. You are trapped.
Why ‘just calm down’ never works
People often tell you to just calm down, as if anxiety is a switch you can flip. You know that does not work. This advice fails because it only addresses the physical symptoms, not the underlying beliefs.
Anxiety is often rooted in old, ingrained patterns of thinking, sometimes from childhood, about what is safe and what is dangerous. As an integrative psychotherapist, Paul Barrett works with clients on these deep-seated fears. You are not trying to get rid of the feeling. You are trying to understand where it came from and how it still affects your choices today. Paul’s anxiety counselling uses a variety of therapeutic models to find a ‘best fit’ approach, which might include working through emotional problems and difficulties that underpin your current level of anxiety. You need a way to challenge those automatic thoughts without immediately giving in to the urge to run away. You need to learn that you can feel anxious and still be safe.
Moving past the fear with expert support
Breaking the anxiety loop requires courage and a different approach. You have to start small. Identify one thing you currently avoid because of anxiety. Maybe it is sending an email or going for a walk down a busy street.
You need to act in spite of the anxious feeling. You allow the feeling to be there, but you do not let it control your behaviour. When you allow yourself to stay with the feeling, rather than pushing it away, you start to weaken its power. You prove to your brain that the fear alarm went off for no real danger.
Anxiety Counselling with Paul Barrett
If your anxiety feels overwhelming, or if you feel stuck in a place of constant stress, getting professional support is a smart move. Paul is an accredited psychotherapist who provides a safe, non-judgemental space to explore what is driving your anxiety. He can help you develop practical strategies to manage it. He has a proven track record in helping many clients move forward with their lives. Get in touch to book your initial appointment.